Throw it back...Pack it up.

2021 marks my 10 year high school reunion. Ya'll. WHAT?!

TEN. YEARS. PEOPLE.

I was in my feels about this, thinking back on all the used-to-been's.

Just reminiscing on the friendships that have since faded. How our lives have grown. I mean truly, we lived for each other back then. We folded in on each other. There weren't too many days we spent apart.

God, we had fun. And sometimes I just miss that. We had no where to go, but everywhere to be. We did things I won't be sharing with my kids...but we survived. We lived in it, all of it. And I loved you guys - don't get me wrong, I still do.

Where ever you are.

Ohh but that teenage angst! There is still high school drama that tears me apart to this day. It's those moments that shaped you, the moments you truly just learned from. Your first heartbreak, and lies - the rumors that kinda broke you a bit. Those friendships that tethered. The personal growth and (hormonal) changes that kinda just shook you for who you thought you were, who you thought *they* were.

My momma always used to preach that high school friends would eventually fade - that I would fall into my "true" friendships later in life. I didn't believe her one bit. I mean, we were each other's everything. The whole group of us. We were going to tackle this world together.

Wouldn't you know it, life smacked us.

Adulthood came knocking and took us for all that we had.

We all took our own paths. Well...except for my husband. I am his only means of survival - so he stuck it out with me. (HAHAHA)

I stood there in the pews and watched nearly all of you get married. I occasionally run into you at the supermarket and we casually catch up. I see pictures of the beautiful lives you are building - and I hope you know I am so proud. We've all made something entirely different out of ourselves. Built ourselves from the ground up.

**Low and behold, my momma was right.**

[side note: I secretly can't wait until my kids find out that I was always right.]

My 20's have been a whole dang journey. It's been a whirlwind honestly.

But you know who I found along the way? My pack.

"Friend" is a loose term for me - I consider so many people my friends, I refer to ya'll as my friend while in conversation, I enjoy my time spent with you - I love you.

But that "true" friendship my momma preached...yeah, I had no clue what that looked like until my mid 20's.

I have 3 women who have completed me.

They embraced my mess.

They love my kids.

They love me when I am so uncertain about myself.

My pack is well rounded. We have a mutual understanding that we can all just fall off the face of the Earth for long periods of time, but know we will never fall out of touch.

I have friend I can dream big dreams with. I can celebrate small victories with. I learn from, because I love the way she loves others. I can let loose and just feel at home with.

I have a friend that I can call last minute to go on a grocery trip with me. We can laugh to the point of tears. Binge watch a whole season on Netflix while our kids run wild in the other room. We can relate on almost every aspect of our lives, while eating too much food and drinking too much wine.

I have a friend I can confide in. I can seek her opinion on literally anything. She'll be on my side, but will also shoot it to me straight.

Yeah...as I am taking the last few years of my 20s in stride, I am damn proud of my pack.

Those friendships of my past may have built me, but the people that fill my life today are part of me.

To my old crew, I am wishing you much love and happiness - and I pray you have found your place in this big ol' world. (I am also praying COVID will play nice and let us all catch up soon).

To my pack, sorry, you're stuck with me.

**20-something's: find your pack, they are necessary for survival. Don't look too hard. It doesn't have to be glamorous. It doesn't need to be filled with girls nights and vacations, bar hopping and busy. It can be filled with quiet. It can be filled with mess. Actually the mess and the boring is the best part. Comfort. That's all you need, if you take it from me.

Much love,

Maddie.